‘He will kill you’ – judge issues stark warning to Kildare woman

A WOMAN who had her jaw previously broken by her ex, and was now in court seeking a second protection order against him with suspected broken ribs following an assault with a fire extinguisher, admitted that she probably wouldn’t press charges against him.

The woman took the stand behind the closed doors of Naas District Court last week (8 October) to ask for a second interim order against her “ex-partner”.

“Two nights ago, he came to my house very intoxicated; he ripped a fire extinguisher off the wall and broke it off my back,” she testified.

“I was very badly injured, suspected two broken ribs, bruised all over, I have the photographs of my injuries.” The woman appeared in court in some physical discomfort and struggled for breath as she spoke on occasion.

“He then damaged all the kids’ toys,” she added.

“Substances?” asked Judge Desmond Zaidan.

“I’m an alcoholic in remission,” she said. “But he has serious addiction issues.” 

Reading the appellant’s written statement, Judge Zaidan referred to the previous assault.

“He was sentenced to prison or breaking your jaw?” he assumed.

“I didn’t press charges,” she said.

“I remember that,” said the judge.

“It was about four years ago. You had bruises all over you body, he kicked and choked you, bit your lip and threatened your parents,” recalled the judge.

“Yeah,” she nodded.

“And then you went back to him?” asked an incredulous Judge Zaidan.

“Unfortunately, yeah. Alongside my addiction, he’s another addiction,” she said.

“I’m, 34, but he’s homeless. The guards arrested him from my house,” she revealed.

“What happens in two days’ time when he comes back crawling and begging?” asked the judge.

“He will do, he’s done it before, but I’ve had enough,” she offered.

“You have to break free. You have (children), but if this continues he will kill you,” said the judge grimly.

“I am aware,” she admitted.

“Have you tried Teach Tearmainn?” asked Judge Zaidan.

He was referring to the women’s refuge in Co Kildare which used to have a walk-in across the road from the courthouse, but have recently moved into larger premises about 50m up the road from the courts.

The judge then turned to the court garda Paul Condon.

“Paul will you bring her across the road. They’re fair people,” he said, before returning to matters at hand.

“I feel really sorry for you. It’s depressing, and I find it difficult to comprehend, but you have been honest and elegant,” offered the judge.

“You have nothing to fear, beyond this man,” he said.

“I want to help you.

“The guards, the court staff, myself, all want to help you.

“Teach Tearmainn will help, don’t turn your back on them, but whatever happens between you and them, (her former partner) will never gain access,” he assured her.

“When did you become addicted?” asked the judge.

“I was very young, maybe 14, when I stole from dad’s cabinet … I caused a lot of problems from my parents, but they are still with me, and they are actually looking after the children right now,” she revealed.

“Show Teach Tearmainn your bruises,” said the judge.

“Have you been to hospital for the broken ribs?” he asked.

“Not yet. I’m going this evening,” she said.

“I will grant this protection order,” said the judge, before going back into the details of the case.

“Have you made a complaint to gardaí about this?” he asked.

“Yes, but to be fair, I probably won’t press charges,” she admitted.

“You will have to change your mental psyche. You have got to press charges for the sake of your children, or he’ll kill you,” the judge starkly warned.

“If you don’t meet the gardaí halfway we’re all hamstrung.

“You’ve been brave to come here, but you have to see it through.

“This order is inclusive of no contact at all, not even over the kids, in any way, shape or form.

“If he’s arrested and brough before me, I will jail him, and give you peace of mind.

“I don’t expect miracle overnight, but you have your own attitude and mental block in your head not to see things through.

“You have got to get over this hurdle.” “I’m telling you now, you have done nothing wrong, even if you were drunk, you did not deserve this, but you are responsible for you and your two children,” he reminded the appellant.

He then set the hearing date (when both parties must attend) for as soon as 12 October.