Fit Focus: Why You Should Never Take Direction from the Directionless
Why are those who are stuck often the first to critique someone trying to move?
YOU’VE done it. You’ve made the decision. Maybe it’s to finally commit to that 5 am gym routine, to pass on the after-work drinks to stick to your budget, or to start that little side hustle you’ve been dreaming about. The fire is lit, your motivation is high, and you feel a surge of purpose. And then, almost inevitably, comes the commentary.
It’s not from the accomplished athlete you follow online. It’s not from the financially free friend whose life you admire. It’s from the coworker who mocks your “rabbit food” lunch, the family member who scoffs at your frugality, or the friend who rolls their eyes at your “phase”.
This criticism stings precisely because it comes from familiar faces, but it’s crucial to recognize it for what it is: the noise of the stagnant. The single most important lesson for anyone on a journey of self-improvement is this: Never let unaccomplished people judge what you are trying to accomplish.
Why are those who are stuck often the first to critique someone trying to move? It’s not really about you; it’s a profound reflection of their own internal state. When you decide to change, you become a walking, talking mirror held up to their own inertia. Your actions silently question their choices. Your progress highlights their lack of it. This creates a cognitive dissonance so uncomfortable that the easiest way to resolve it is to dismiss or disparage your efforts.
People who are lost, bored, or lacking direction have often surrendered to a state of complacency. Their comfort zone, while unfulfilling, is safe because it’s known. Your journey into the unknown threatens that fragile equilibrium. By labelling your goals as “extreme,” “unnecessary,” or “impossible,” they can comfortably return to their own narrative that success isn’t achievable, or worse, isn’t worth the effort. Their criticism is a defence mechanism designed to protect their own ego from the painful truth that change is possible — if only they had the courage to try.
The Stark Contrast: Builders vs. Breakers Consider this powerful truth: fit people never criticize someone for trying to lose weight. They’ve been on the path; they know the struggle, the sweat, and the triumph. They are the first to offer a word of encouragement, a form correction, or a recipe tip. They are builders.
Wealthy, financially literate people never mock someone for saving money, budgeting, or investing. They understand the power of compound interest and delayed gratification. They are more likely to share a book recommendation or discuss strategy than to ridicule a frugal choice. They, too, are builders.
Why? Because accomplished individuals in any field operate from a mindset of abundance and growth. They see your success as an additive to the world, not subtractive from their own. Their identity is secure, so they don’t feel threatened by your ascent. They have climbed the mountain and are now cheering from the summit, shouting down directions.
The critic, on the other hand, is still at the base camp, telling everyone that the climb is too dangerous and the view isn’t that great anyway. They are breakers. Having built nothing of their own, they find purpose in picking apart the efforts of others.
So, how do you armour yourself against this energy? It begins with a fundamental shift in whose opinion you value.
Before internalizing any criticism, perform a simple audit. Is this person someone I want to trade places with? Do they embody the qualities I am striving for? If the answer is no, their opinion on your journey holds zero weight. File it accordingly and move on.
You cannot grow in toxic soil. Be ruthlessly intentional about who you share your dreams with. Surround yourself with “builders”—people who ask curious questions, who celebrate your small wins, and who inspire you to be better. This might mean finding a new running partner, joining an online community of savers, or simply spending less time with the breakers in your life.
When you start facing resistance, see it not as a reason to stop, but as confirmation that you are moving in the right direction. You are leaving the stagnant pond and heading for the ocean. The noise is simply the sound of the shore fading behind you.
Your goals are precious. They are the seeds of your future self. Protect them. Do not water them with the opinions of those who have never cultivated a garden of their own. Keep your head down, focus on your path, and remember: the loudest critics are rarely the experts in the arena; they are the spectators in the cheapest seats, whose only power is the volume of their voice. Don’t grant them the power to direct your life.
